Putting Out the Vibe Random observations from my day-to-day life

September 2, 2009

It’s finally official!

Filed under: Hilarity,Madison — Tags: , , , , , — Matthew @ 11:01 am
Marsha Rummel, 6th District Alderwoman who sponsored the Resolution to make the Flabongo the official bird of Madison

Marsha Rummel, 6th District Alderwoman who sponsored the Resolution to make the Flabongo the official bird of Madison

After years of hard work – transforming plastic flamingos into flabongos and drinking beer and the occasional franzia from their beaks – it’s finally official: the flabongo is now the official bird of Madison.  I would like to personally congratulate all those who made this possible, including my brother, roommate Andrew, Chilla the Gorilla, Warren, IIE, The Badger Short Bus, Creepy J, and of course Marsha Rummel – the sponsor of the city council resolution.  I’m relieved that the Madison Common Council members are holding firm to the platforms for which they were each elected.  Now if only the university would let me take FAC for credit.

May 26, 2009

Ground ball to shortstop, look at the body on that broad, over to 1st base, two down

Filed under: Baseball,Hilarity — Tags: , , , — Matthew @ 3:43 pm
Tailgating
Our group at the Brewers/Twins game

I’ve waited my whole life for a Brewers team to be competitive and worth routing for. When I was younger, although I always enjoyed catching games at County Stadium, maintaining interest in Milwaukee baseball started to become a chore by around July for me.  The past few years, maintaining “brewer fever” has become easier each year of college.  I’ve even been able to easily enjoy brewer games, without frustration, for entire seasons – including catching a postseason game this past fall (an opportunity I thought I wouldn’t have in my lifetime).  The change, which continues to gain momentum, was a gradual one, probably sparked, in my opinion by a shift towards leadership willing to open their wallet to compete in the central division with the Cards, Astros, and the bitch-Cubs (all three with #13, #8, & #3 payrolls in the majors – Brewers are currently #17). Henry & I ready for the domeIn Bud Selig’s credit, however, he did do a decent job in his charge to graduates at my recent graduation.  Additional dedication to winning was demonstrated in 2008 by a replacement of Ned Yost prior to the end of the Brewers best season since their last playoff birth in 1982.  Things are definitely looking up and I just enjoyed a great weekend in Minneapolis (despite a Twins sweep), for the interleague series and catching up with friends who I rarely see now that they graduated and are real people.

Despite all of the challenging seasons that Brewers fans endured throughout my childhood, however, the one constant of brilliance was always Mr. Baseball, Bob Uecker.  An unbelievable schmoozer of useless, yet extremely interesting information, because of Uecker, I occasionally go out of my way to be in my car during Brewers games, instead of watching them on TV (although I enjoy Bill Schroeder as well).  This weekend in the cities, my friend Mike shared a hilarious video of Artie Lange on Letterman sharing stories about Bob Uecker and also his friendship with Harry Caray:

This clip of Norm MacDonald sharing a Uecker story is pretty good as well.

May 13, 2009

Vas up? or Train to Auschwitz?

Some big developments for me recently.  I finshed my undergrad (who cares), I joined Twitter (for ideas too random or short for this blog), and I’ve been really into showing friends two online videos this week.  The first video is the Bruno trailor.  It looks INCREDIBLE and I think has the potential to be more ridiculous than Borat.


…that is such a Samantha thing to say. Then there’s the sequel to Dick in a Box that aired on SNL this past Saturday when JT was once again hosting…

March 23, 2009

Coalition of the willing monkeys

Filed under: Hilarity,TV — Tags: , , , , , , , — Matthew @ 2:22 am

I typically associate myself with the conservative side of politics, however, after watching Will Ferrell’s “You’re Welcome America” on HBO for the second time, some absolutely ridiculous portions of his stand-up comedy caused me to wonder, “can that possibly be real.”  There were hilarious quotes that Bush actually said, such as,

“Removing Saddam Hussein was the right decision early in my presidency, it is the right decision now, and it will be the right decision ever.”
-George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., March 12, 2008

Moroccan-Land-Mine-Detonating-MonkeysHowever, some of the things that Will Ferrell went into elaborate detail about were so ridiculous that I wondered if the statements were even closely based on fact.  Maybe I was on a hiatus from the current events pipeline when some of these things actually happened.  For example, among the 46 countries in the “Coalition of the Willing” against Iraq, was Palau (mainly known for their great scuba diving, coconuts, and tapioca), Costa Rica, Iceland, the Marshall Islands, Micronesia, and the Solomon Islands, all of which have no military whatsoever.  This Washington Post article gives a pretty hilarious account of just how elite “the willing” were.  Will Ferrell even went on a rant about Morocco agreeing to send 2,000 land-mine-detonating monkeys, to which I thought “no F-ing way this is real.”  I was wrong. Evidently, back in 2003, United Press International reported that a newspaper in Rabat, Morocco claimed that Morocco offered to send 2,000 monkeys from the Atlas Mountains, “trained” in detonating land mines, to Iraq.  I’m not sure we took them up on this offer, but Will Ferrell sure did have some hilarious things to say about these “crazy, land-mine-detonating/child-entertaining monkeys.”  Ferrell’s act also reminded me of a Daily Show clip that stands out in my memory as one the most hilarious in the show’s history (it gets good around 4:15):

March 20, 2008: Iraq: The First 5 Years

January 14, 2009

No answer?

Filed under: Hilarity,Nerdiness — Tags: , — Matthew @ 12:54 pm

pic-pythagorast1

Our offense is like the pythagorean theorem: There is no answer!
-Shaq

I guess Pythagoras got it wrong back in the 500s (BC that is).

January 10, 2009

The Disneyland of Mexican Restaurants!

Filed under: Colorado,Hilarity,TV — Tags: , , , — Matthew @ 3:02 pm

While in Colorado during winter break I accomplished three significant things:

  1. Spent time with Dave and Brea
  2. Skied four days with Lee in Keystone, Vail, and Copper Mountain (my first time at Copper)
  3. Ate the Mexican dinner of a lifetime at Casa Bonita!

If you’re unfamiliar with the restaurant, this requires a bit of background.  The official Casa Bonita website provides some basic information, as does the Casa Bonita wikipedia page, however, the true essence of the experience is best captured in the South Park episode, Casa Bonita.  Here is the full episode: Episode 711 (Original Air Date: Nov 12, 2003)

We approached our visit with caution because I was told to prepare for a months worth of indigestion after my all you can eat Mexican dinner.  One Mexican platter and 5 tacos later, I realized that this advice was… well, pretty accurate.  However, what they lacked in quality of food, they more than made up for with ambiance, cliff diving, Black Bart’s cave, strolling mariachis, and skiball in the amusement arcade.  I wanted to include video comparisons of our trip and Cartman’s, but WordPress doesn’t let you embed the video that I wanted to.  Check out these clips (Mexican Disneyland, More Sopapillas, Please!, Totally Worth Juvenile Hall) and then see below how our experience mirrored Eric Cartman’s.

 

Eric Cartman’s Experience
Our Experience
Cartman at Casa Bonita

Casa Bonita

Lee and I at Casa Bonita

Cartman at Black Bart's Cave

Group at Casa Bonita

Cartman near Casa Bonita Cliff Diver
Cartman - top of Casa Bonita Waterfall
Casa Bonita Cliff Diver
Cartman eating
Group eating at Casa Bonita
Cartman taken from his food
Sopapillas
Cartman in Black Bart's cave
Skiball
Strolling Mariachis
Mexican Manger

July 31, 2008

Climbing the ladder

Filed under: Hilarity,Random Observations — Tags: , , — Matthew @ 7:52 pm

During our road trip to Colorado this summer the conversation pretty much covered the bases of everything from The Office, to disgusting things that we had only heard about but never tried, and even dating.  One thing that Jake brought up was Ladder Theory (the website is way more elaborate than I expected).  It’s pretty Womens' Ladders, from www.laddertheory.comfreaking hilarious though and surprisingly accurate…for the most part.  The guy who came up with it must either really hate women or is unemployed with a lot of free time.
The basic concept is that girls have two different social ladders for which they classify guys that they meet.  On one ladder they place guys that they are solely interested in being friends with and on the other ladder they place guys who they’re actually interested in.  Then it claims that unlike women, guys have only one ladder and they place every girl they ever meet on the same ladder.  For example, if a guy meets a girl and finds her uglier than Michael Jackson in a dress, she would be pretty much at the bottom and a girl who is able to turn heads in a gay bar would probably be close to the top.  I found the funniest diagrams to be the one to the right, showing how if a guy tries to jump from the friendship ladder to the real ladder he either successfully reaches the real ladder (which is very rare) or he ruins everything and falls into the relationship abyss, from which there is no turning back.  Hilarious.
Some of my favorite quotes from the website were:

  • “There are some interests you can show in a woman that will help you to f* her: a healthy interest in destroying her self-esteem and in f*ing her friends more than her seem to work wonders. Note that the following topics of disinterest have been field tested and shown conclusively not to work: Unix, literature, poetry, international politics, and sodomy.”
  • “problems can be avoided by declaring as soon as possible to a girl that you will not be friends under any circumstances…”
  • “A lot of people have asked about the significant others of friends and if they are special cases of the Ladder. They are not. These are not your friends. These are virtual friends.”
  • “A note for guys: if your friends girl offers you a piece you should hit that shit, because he shouldn’t be laying up with no ho. Ideally you should tape it also, because most guys will believe the person they’re f*ing.”
  • It also listed a great quote from Dave Chappelle: “A woman’s test is material. A man’s test is a woman…if a man could f* in a cardboard box, he wouldn’t buy a house.”

There’s also an article about Ladder Theory on Wikipedia.  I guess you could say it’s kind of a big deal (except the article lacks any real citations).

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